Adult children #cherrypiecure

posted by susan-oh-susan / april 25 at 6:45 am / uncategorized / 11 comments

Tyler came home yesterday. I had a roast chicken and mashed potatoes waiting for him, and chocolate chip cookies and lemon meringue pie. And yes, some vegetables too, but neither he nor you really care what I steamed, do you?

“Sublimating less, Mom?” he said between bites.

I blushed.

He gave me the world’s biggest bag of pot as an early Mother’s Day present.

“Because I trust you didn’t go buying shit that was laced with god-knows-what on the train platform?” he said sternly. As if I was the child. I nodded. “This is organic, clean, clean, medicinal quality British Columbia weed,” he said as he rolled us a joint.

Yes, I smoked a joint with my son again.

On the front porch.

I told him a little about Reza.

He told me he just had his first thing with a boy.

I didn’t choke on the joint or anything.

“Are you gay?” I asked.

“I don’t think so,” he said. “But I’m not sure. It was interesting.”

“Have you ever had a… thing… with a girl?” I asked.

“Not really,” he said. “I’m just getting started looking into this stuff. I think I might just be a late bloomer.”

And we mostly left it at that.

I told him I was going to stay over at Reza’s place on Friday.

He nodded. “Cool.”

Then, after a pause, “You should text me the address. You know. To be safe.”

As if I was the child.

Having adult children is very weird.

*

11 comments on Adult children:

sugar&spice76: Tell me about it, honey. Mine are younger—just teening—but sweet Jesus, I was not ready for this.

susan-oh-susan: What’s going on, Sugar?

sugar&spice76: Girl stuff. Boy stuff. Drug stuff. Drama stuff. They’re good kids, mind you, they’re good kids. But they’re killing me right now.

FemmeFataleFun: Yeah, right now, I really wish I had boys, not girls. You have one of each, Sugar? I’ve got three girls. Eleven, fourteen, and seventeen. Here’s the horror show: the youngest has just started menstruating. And we are all coordinated. Do you know what it means to have four PMSing women in the house at the same time?

ilikeherbooty-full: Holy fucking buzz kill, Femme! If you say tampon, I’m leaving.

BeautifulThingsEveryday: Tampon.

ilikeherbooty-full: You, baby, I’m inured to.

*

sugar&spice76: Femme? You. Are. Awesome. Thank you.

ilikeherbooty-full: So, Femme, like anytime someone has a problem, you send them a dildo or a vibrator?

FemmeFataleFun: I know a good dildo doesn’t solve any problems. But it makes many of them more bearable.

mommyshidinginthebathroom3: ROFLMAO.

…

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mjanecolette
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