I am probably insane #cherrypiecure

posted by susan-oh-susan / march 11 at 9:45 pm / uncategorized / 21 comments

I spent the whole day wanting to go to Safeway for more baking supplies. But I didn’t. I made do with what I had at home.

Tyler slept half the day and ate the other half, and then tried to convince me to go clubbing with him.

Could you imagine? Me? In a night club? With my son?


I baked instead.

Thought about going to Safeway about sixteen dozen times.


Tyler’s right.

I am sublimating.

Oh. I did put batteries in the vibrator. And turned it on. Oh-my-god.

It’s like a Turbo jet.

A. No way can I use that with my kids in the house.

B. No way is that coming anywhere near my private parts.


21 comments on I am probably insane:

BeautifulThingsEveryday: Pussy, pussy, pussy, it’s called a pussy. Or, in certain circumstances, a cunt.

susan-oh-susan: I told you before, don’t use that word on my blog.

BeautifulThingsEveryday: What word?

susan-oh-susan: C… you know what I mean.

BeautifulThingsEveryday: Phttttpt.

susan-oh-susan: I’m not that crazy about the P word either.

sugar&spice76: Pussy’s nice. Just listen to it. Purrr. The other… it is not a nice word, honey.

BeautifulThingsEveryday: I like it and claim it as my own.

FemmeFataleFun: Me too. It’s a powerful word. But I don’t use it at parties—personal or professional.

mommyshidinginthebathroom3: I’m with Sugar. Gross and negative and yuck.

ilikeherbooty-full: Can I weigh in on this?

BeautifulThingsEveryday: No!

sugar&spice76: Nope.

mommyshidinginthebathroom3: Off limits for you.

susan-oh-susan: I agree with them this time, Jerome.

BeautifulThingsEveryday: His name is Jerome? How do you know his name?

ilikeherbooty-full: What, you think I had her send the cherry pie digitally to ilikeherbooty-fulldotcom? I’m, like, a legitimate, real person. With a street address. And—drum roll—a name. Jerome. Nice to meet you, Cougar.

BeautifulThingsEveryday: You’re a fucking porn blogger!

ilikeherbooty-full: I am not! I have a Tumblr account on which I share pics of shit I like. That’s all.

BeautifulThingsEveryday: Susan, did you look at his fucking blog before sending him the pie?

susan-oh-susan: No. And I’m not going to. It doesn’t matter. I sent him pie. Not a picture of my breasts or… you know.

Find out more: Cherry Pie Cure: Cast of Characters and More

(including fabulous paper)


PS A Table of Contents of the Cherry Pie Cure/Susan’s Writing Cure Blog posts can be found at the Cherry Pie Cure landing page.

Feature image source: https://www.pexels.com/photo/bakery-baking-cake-chocolate-264892/

About mjanecolette

Writer. Reader. Angster. Reformed Bohemian (not). Author of the erotic romance TELL ME, the erotic tragedy (with a happy ending) CONSEQUENCES (of defensive adultery), the award-winning rom-com (she's versatile) CHERRY PIE CURE, and TEXT ME, CUPID--a (slightly dirty) love story for 21st century adults who don't believe in love... but want it anyway. A sought-after speaker and presenter, Colette is also the author of the Dirty Writing Secrets Series, which includes the non-fiction collection of essays ROUGH DRAFT CONFESSIONS: not a guide to writing and selling erotica and romance but full of inside inside anyway, 101 FLIRTY WRITING PROMPTS TO SEDUCE YOUR MUSE, and ORGANIZED CREATIVE. She's also the curator of the fab YYC Queer Writers anthologies Queer Christmas in Cowtown, Screw Chocolate, and A Queer Summer Night's in Cowtown. Releasing Spring 2020: CUPID IN MONTE CARLO.

One comment

  1. Pingback: Cherry Pie Cure–the real time Blog Edition | m jane colette

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